Young Handel-Bar (with apologies to Sir Walter Scott)
O Young Handel-Bar is come out of the West,
In all the wide borders his tandem is best
Save adjustable spanner, his weapons had none –
He rode without kit, except a half comb
So faithful to touring, so fast and so far
There never was a cyclist like Young Handel-Bar
He stayed not to brake, he stopped not for stone
He bumped and he bounced, for surface was none;
But ‘ere he alighted at the Youth Hostel gate
The bride had consented, the gallant came late:
For a laggard at travel, who never rode far
Was to wed Freewheel Fannie from Bold Handel-Bar
So bravely he entered the common-room hall
Among the brides clubmates and family and all
The spoke Fannie’s father, a hand on a spanner
(While the poor craven bridegroom betrayed timid manner)
“Oh come ye by cycle, or come ye by car
“Twill cost you a shilling, my bold Handel-Bar!”
“I long rode with your daughter”, young Handel-Bar cried
From Lands End to Groat’s house, my tandem astride
And a shilling, my warden, I never did pay
When a sixpence sufficed my lodging to stay
There are maidens in Britain more lovely by far
And sixpenny hostels for Young Handel-Bar!
“For the sake of old times, before I depart
“A health and a dance I crave, then I will start”
The father demurred and his wife disagreed
And the groom sulked dissent like the wormy bread
But the company present approval did dare
And that was enough for young Handel-Bar.
The bride brought the teapot, our brave brought the cup
And quaffed in one gulp the whole of it up –
Although tea was rationed, and sugar as well,
Our hero had scorched through dale and o’er fell
Then he took her soft hand ere her parent could bar –
“Now, can you pedal?” whispered young Handel-Bar
So stately his form, so lovely her face
There never was hostel such couple did grace
While mother did fret, and father raised Cain
And the weather outside ‘gan pouring with rain
They were off on the tandem, by bush, bank, and scar
“They’ll follow on singles, quoth bold Handel-Bar.
There was mounting ‘mong Wheelers and Clarion too
While father and mother tailed after the crew;
There was racing and chasing o’er moor and o’er lea
But Freewheel Fannie ne’er again did they see
With his half comb as trousseau she travelled so far
And her guardian companion was Young Handel-Bar January 1941
The Islands of the Blest
There’s a path beneath the Bens
Leading on towards the west
O’er the muir and through the glens
To the Islands ot the Blest!
By Arkaig and Dessary
Plodding on with scarce a rest
Mountain pass and inland sea
To the Islands of the Blest!
Now, what memories awake!
Limping down to Inverie
Upon the boat with creamy wake
And the Islands of the Sea.
Towering heights above the Kyle
Cloudlets floating on their crest
Restless sea, and rock-bound isle –
Hail! The Islands of the Blest December 1945
