Poems 15

The Way of the We.R.7


Now Billy had a happy way

Of preaching to his flock each day

Touching on some pious lay

          Exhuding from his head:

Once when on a Sunday run,

          We named him, at set of sun

The Reverend Berry – just for fun

          He looked at us and said:-


“Dear beloved brethren,

          The text today will be;

A bird that in the arms doth rest,

           Is worth two in the tree:

So next time that you catch a bird

          Just take her to a leafy place

Remember well that, anyway

          You can always let her fly away

If you don’t like –  her face!”


Joe, he wooed a lovely maid

          Every evening in the shade

Meaning, I am much afraid

          To hide his curly head….

But when he proposed one night

Did it by electric light

Marion, who’d retained her sight

          Just looked at him and said:-


“Oh,  Mr  Johnstone

          It isn’t any good;

I wouldn’t like to marry you

          So I won’t pretend I should;

I know that you have curly hair

I know you can set the pace –

I haven’t a doubt that you must be

The properest possible match for me

          But I don’t like –  your ways!”


Tom, he wooed another maid –

          Used to sing and serenade

Neath her window oft he brayed

          While she lay abed

Then the question once he popped

On his bony knees he dropped

And when his yodelling he had stopped

          She glanced at him and said:-


“Oh Mr Idle

          I like you very well:

How I’d love to marry you

          I can never tell

Life for me in future years

Won’t be quite the same;

For to wed is my desire

And you’re the boy I most admire –

          But I don’t like your name!”


Yet another maiden bright

          Was wooed by Fred from morn till night;

He found in her his sole delight –

          Completely lost his head

And though it seemed of no avail

For oft his heart would in him fail

Atl last he told to her the tail

          At which she blushed  and said :-


“Oh Mr Marsh

          You have a winning way:

And though I hate to hurt you dear

I feel that I must say –

You know I love your cuddling

At the corner of the street:

But when sitting on your knees

          I feel as though I’m going to freeze –

For I cannot stand – cold feet!”


Once I rode for miles and miles,

Captured by a Welsh girl’s wiles

Basking in her sunny smiles

          Downhill did I tread:

Then one night when lights were low

With faltering heart and accents slow

I asked her if she – well you know…

          And this is what she said:-


“Oh Mr Chadwick

          I’m very fond of you

And it is with delight I hear

          That you love me too:

Every time you leave me dear,

          I want you more and more –

So we will build a little nest

And live our lives as we think best

          But tell me! Do you snore?”      

                                                            PS It is said that I snore  1926



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